Today we have our first ever guest post in the Becoming a Better Mother Series. I am excited to introduce you to Stef because her posts always motivate me to strive for the best. If there is anyone who is working hard toward becoming a better mother, it’s her! I hope you will be encouraged and inspired.
“Give me a second”, “Just hold on a minute”,
“Can’t you figure it out”, “I’ll be right there.”
They want more of me – yet I give them less. They need me … and I schedule them into a bracket that is more convenient for me – always labeled LATER. I wonder – what would selfless mothering look like.
You see those moms – sitting back not engaged looking more like lifeguards than mothers.
What happens when we climb our red lifeguard chairs and observe our children rather than interact with them?
My mom worked data entry (back when there were typewriters) so she stayed home with us. She typed downstairs – while we played around her. We were not permitted to interrupt her because the more work she completed the more money she made. My dad worked nights and traveled for his job. I was left in the care of my sister – 6yrs older than me, who had no desire to be my babysitter. More times than not I played alone in an imaginary world full of imaginary friends. Friends who were always happy to see me and always had time for me. I was lonely.
Of course the first promise I made as a new mother, “I will never be unavailable for my children.” I’ve broken that promise. A stay-at-home mom – still no longer available for those staying at home. Can I tell you something … most times it’s selfish. Give me just one more chapter, one more worship song, one more scoop of ice-cream, five more minutes in bed, after this show, two more minutes online . . . these minutes these seconds – they add up in a child’s heart!
And if putting off my children wasn’t bad enough – to make up the time I’ve turned multitasking into a burden. Moms naturally can easily multitask, so I am challenging myself not to do it. Rather than bring a book I’m jumping in. Instead of sitting back I’m picking up the wii remote. I’ve put down the phone to push a swing. Join me?
God comes alongside us when we need it, not just when it fits best into His schedule. How we respond to our child’s needs gives them a living example of what God wants to offer them in a much larger realm of their lives.
-Grace Based Parenting Dr. Tim Kimmel
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